satire
When – about 14 years ago – it was my turn, I looked forward to retirement: endless sleep-ins, zero airport security lines for lectures at distant places, no more struggling to keep awake at boring meeting, and a calendar so beautifully blank it belongs in a modern art museum. I looked forward to the complete absence of so-called peers – mostly people who had no idea about my research – criticising or trying to influence my work. And even more I rejoiced in the prospect of having no university administrators needlessly complicating my life, while taking a big chunk of my research funding for the benefit.
When you retire as an academic, you genuinely believe you’ve escaped the university rat race – only to soon realize you’ve just been traded to a different league with much worse perks. Suddenly, your mornings are dictated not by an alarm clock, but by a relentless, self-imposed to-do list. You’re busier than ever, while operating alone and on a budget that makes your old expense-account days feel like the reign of Louis XIV.
Of course, not all academics keep on working after retirement. Some manage to just drop everything from one day to the next thinking they will now look after the garden, trimm roses, walk the dog, etc. I know many who have chosen this type of approach to retirement. For a few months, it all seems to go fine. Then they realise the increaingly painful emptiness and lack of purpose. More often than not, a low mood creeps in, followed by depression and/or taking to the bottle (perhaps this is why the Exeter medical school gave me a set of huge [and apparently expensive] wine glasses as a leaving present?).
No, staying active and doing what one likes must be the secret of remaining sane after retirement – at least for me. So, I rolled up my sleeves and got on with it. I started this blog (thanks Alan) where I have now published well over 3000 posts. I also began writing colums for newspapers – in English, German and French, to make it a bit more interesting. And then I got into books; this turned out to be more fun (and far less money) than expected. Since retiring I so far managed an average of about one per year – 16 to be precise, and currently three more in the pipeline.
Yes, I do keep myself busy, but this approach does unquestionably have its surprises. The real shocker, is the devastating loss of infrastructure. Yesterday you were a visionary leader; today, you are your own secretary, IT department, mailroom clerk, travel agent, and administrative assistant – and frankly, your staff is frightfully incompetent! There is nobody to filter out annoying requests, meaning you are fully exposed to every crank on the planet. Your former co-workers no longer do the knuckle work of the research, so things get slower and slower. Technical assistance is nowhere to be found; when the printer jams or the Wi-Fi malfunctions, you are on your utterly incompetent own. Every little task takes hours or days. You’ve traded business casual for sweatpants or shorts, but the “hassle” didn’t disappear; if anything, it becomes bigger and bigger. It just rebranded itself as a full-time, unpaid internship where you are both the demanding boss and the disgruntled employee.
But am I not supposed to enjoy life during retirement?
I promise you, I do that too!
Some friends keep asking me whether I don’t want to finally retire for real, relax and be happy.
“What do you mean?”, I respond.
“Well, you know, do what you really like.”
“But that’s what I am doing!”
It is true – honestly.
I am productive because I am content – and not the other way round.
I found an interesting article in the hilarity-prone journal ‘HOMEOPATHY’. I hope it might amuse you:
The concept of antidotes in homeopathy holds a central place in classical doctrine and daily clinical practice, yet remains l argely unexplored in scientific literature. Antidotes are traditionally defined as substances, remedies, environmental factors or physiological and emotional influences capable of suppressing, altering or interrupting the action of a homeopathic medicine. From a classical homeopathic perspective, any factor capable of modifying the totality of symptoms—thereby influencing remedy selection and follow-up—may be regarded as a potential antidoting influence. Unlike conventional pharmacological antidotes, which act through molecular interactions, homeopathic antidoting is conceived as an interference with the organism’s adaptive and regulatory response. This review revisits the historical foundations of antidotes, examines their clinical importance and explores potential scientific re-interpretations grounded in contemporary neurobiology, psychophysiology and systems medicine. Classical authors, including Hahnemann, Kent, Allen and Boericke, are critically reviewed, and the phenomenon of antidoting is discussed in light of stress physiology, placebo–nocebo mechanisms, hormesis and network regulation. We propose that antidotes represent early empirical descriptions of system-level modulation rather than substance antagonism. Finally, research perspectives are outlined to encourage methodological investigation of antidoting using modern biomedical tools.
Homeopaths administer an antidote when they fear a remedy produces too strong a reaction, to moderate the response. According to homeopathic belief, accidental antidoting commonly occurs through exposure to things like:
- coffee,
- camphor,
- mint,
- menthol,
- eucalyptus,
- strong odors.
- essential oils,
- perfumes,
- toothpaste,
- emotional shock,
- physical shock,
- dental work,
- numerous drugs.
An antidote, according to homeopathic teaching, specifically stops the previous remedy’s action. Each remedy has particular antidotes; for example, Natrum muriaticum is antidoted with mint, while Arnica may be antidoted by coffee. I should add that this concept is, of course, not scientifically validated and therefore pure fantasy.
Has anyone seen a reaction to a homeopathic remedy that is too strong and needs moderation?
No?
Me neither!
Hold on, Arsenic D1 perhaps?
But I am sure the author does not refer to this scenario. Homeopathic remedies are understood to be highly diluted; they contain nothing – even if it says Arsenic on the label. Placebos do not need antidotes because they don’t cause strong reactions.
Therefore, antidotes to homeopathy are a nonsense!
Hold on, this might not be correct. I just thought of a powerful antidote to homeopathy:
SCIENCE!
For some time, I had suspected that the stupidity of Robert F. Kennedy Jr. runs deep. Just how deep, is a surprise even to me. Let me give you just two examples from a choice of plenty:
EXAMPLE No 1
In January 2026, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. released far-reaching new Dietary Guidelines for Americans 2025–2030. They dramatically “flipped the food pyramid” by encouraging Americans to consume red meat and whole milk, sources previously discouraged by public health experts because of their contributios to heart disease and other chronic conditions.
“American households must prioritize whole, nutrient-dense foods—protein, dairy, vegetables, fruits, healthy fats, and whole grains—and dramatically reduce highly processed foods. This is how we Make America Healthy Again”, Kennedy commented. “Thanks to the bold leadership of President Trump, this edition of the Dietary Guidelines for Americans will reset federal nutrition policy, putting our families and children first as we move towards a healthier nation,” Secretary Rollins said. “At long last, we are realigning our food system to support American farmers, ranchers, and companies that grow and produce real food. Farmers and ranchers are at the forefront of the solution, and that means more protein, dairy, vegetables, fruits, healthy fats, and whole grains on American dinner tables.”
The scientific community responded with outrage, calling it a reckless abandonment of evidence-based nutrition and science. Promoting saturated fats and red meats contradicts decades of medical research and will increase cardiovascular disease rates across the US.
EXAMPLE No 2
In a hilarious revelation Robert F. Kennedy Jr. took to Joe Rogan’s podcast to inform the world that the UK has become a dystopian nightmare. “It’s like the Soviets. It’s like Kafka,” he declared in February 27, 2026.
The trigger for this epiphany? David Lammy, the UK’s Deputy Prime Minister, announced plans to scrap jury trials for offenses carrying less than three years imprisonment. Instead, a judge will decide. Lammy felt that this was necessary because of the backlog that meant cases could not be heard for years. RFK Jr., ever the historian, reminded listeners that the UK was once the “birthplace of Magna Carta”. Now, according to him, the UK is a “dictatorship over speech restrictions”.
Joe Rogan was horrified. “Existential threat to freedom of thought!” he cried, as if the UK had outlawed laughter or something. The pair seemed genuinely shocked that a country with a functioning parliament and a Prime Minister might have different ideas about justice than, say, a certain American podcast audience.
The comparison to Kafka is particularly weird: Kafka’s The Trial features a man arrested by a mysterious bureaucracy for an unspecified crime. Meanwhile, RFK Jr. seems to be arguing that replacing juries with judges in minor cases is the moral equivalent of the Soviet Union. A bold claim, especially from someone whose vis part of a government that checks people’s social media upon arrival – one of several reasons why I would never travel to the US, while these people are in power. But not as bold as Kennedy’s Nazi and Holocaust references in relation to vaccines. In his 2025 HHS confirmation hearing, Senator Raphael Warnock pressed him on statements likening the CDC to a “Nazi death camp,” which RFK Jr. denied, claiming he was comparing injury rates rather than the institution itself.
Perhaps the real dystopia is RFK Jr. spending his time lecturing other countries while the US degrades into a Kafkaesque nightmare of its own?
Recent statements concerning US pharmaceutical pricing have drawn renewed attention to an entirely new horizon in mathematics. The method, associated with remarks by Donald Trump and repeated by several of his sycophants, departs from standard arithmetic in a manner that is rhetorically vigorous but mathematically ridiculous.
Percentage change is defined relative to a single, clearly specified baseline. A decrease from $600 to $100 is therefore calculated as (600-100)/600×100 = 83.3%. In other words, the price falls by 83.3% relative to the original $600 price. This is the method used in economics, finance, accounting, retail pricing, and presumably even by the secondary-school mathematics teachers who attempted to educate Trump.
However, the new alternative math proceeds differently. It implicitly combines two distinct operations: first, the increase from $100 to $600, correctly described as a 500% rise when measured against the initial $100; and second, the subsequent decrease from $600 back to $100. Rather than evaluating this decrease against the higher price, however, the method appears to retain the earlier, lower baseline, thereby generating a claim of a “600% saving.” The arithmetic equivalent of moving the goalposts and then declaring victory by an even larger margin.
Within standard mathematics, this shift in baseline is not permissible. Percentage changes are inherently asymmetric because they depend entirely on the reference point selected. The same absolute difference – in this case, $500 – produces different percentage values depending on whether it is measured relative to $100 or $600. This is not a technical loophole but the entire point of percentages.
The problem with this approach becomes clearer if one follows it to its logical conclusion. Under standard arithmetic, a 100% price reduction means the price has fallen all the way to zero: a $100 product reduced by 100% costs nothing. A reduction greater than 100% would therefore produce a negative price, meaning the seller would have to pay the customer to accept the product. If one claims that a fall from $600 to $100 represents a 600% decrease, the numbers cease to correspond to any coherent pricing system. The calculation implies that prices can fall not merely to zero, but to values several times smaller than zero.
The attraction of the Trump method is easy to understand. By selecting whichever baseline produces the largest possible percentage, the resulting figure acquires an air of spectacular achievement. It transforms an already substantial price reduction into something approaching numerical performance art.
Trump’s alternative arithmetic therefore succeeds in generating impressively large numbers by abandoning the one feature percentages require most: consistency. The result is as unsound as most things about Trump. Yet it seems rhetorically effective – particularly with “low IQ people”, as Trump likes to call his followers.
In other words, by cherry-picking the baseline for maximum impact, the Trump method turns an already solid 83% cut into a sensational “600% savings”. It sacrifices precision for hype – effective populism perhaps, poor math for sure!
None of this would be worth mentioning, of course, if it were the only incident where Trump misleads his public. Sadly, he is telling multiple and often much more consequential untruths on a daily basis.
- IHMPs (verum; n = 67),
- or identical-looking placebos (control; n = 67)
Both treatments were administered alongside standard concomitant care including sitz baths, pelvic floor exercises, and dietary advice.
- Department of Repertory, D. N. De Homoeopathic Medical College and Hospital, Government of West Bengal, Kolkata, India.
- East Bishnupur State Homoeopathic Dispensary, Chandi Daulatabad Block Primary Health Centre, under Department of Health & Family Welfare, Government of West Bengal, Parganas, India.
- Department of Pathology & Microbiology, D. N. De Homoeopathic Medical College and Hospital, Government of West Bengal, Kolkata, India.
- Department of Organon of Medicine and Homoeopathic Philosophy, D. N. De Homoeopathic Medical College and Hospital, Government of West Bengal, Kolkata, India.
- Department of Materia Medica, D. N. De Homoeopathic Medical College and Hospital, Government of West Bengal, Kolkata, India.
- Department of Organon of Medicine and Homoeopathic Philosophy, National Institute of Homoeopathy, Ministry of AYUSH, Government of India, Salt Lake, Kolkata, India.
- Department of Community Medicine, D. N. De Homoeopathic Medical College and Hospital, Government of West Bengal, Tangra, India.
This list does not inspire me with confidence that this study is reliable.
Next I looked around for further trials of homeopathy for hemorrhoids – and I found another study by the same authors published 2 years earlier in the same dodgy journal:
Objectives: To investigate the efficacy and safety of individualized homeopathic medicines (IHMs) in treating hemorrhoids compared with placebo. Design: This is a double-blind, randomized (1:1), two parallel arms, placebo-controlled trial. Setting: The trial was conducted at the surgery outpatient department of the State National Homoeopathic Medical College and Hospital, Lucknow, Uttar Pradesh, India. Subjects: Patients were 140 women and men, aged between 18 and 65 years, with a diagnosis of primary hemorrhoids grades I-III for at least 3 months. Excluded were the patients with grade IV hemorrhoids, anal fissure, and fistula, hypertrophic anal papillae, inflammatory bowel disease, coagulation disorders, rectal malignancies, obstructed portal circulation, patients requiring immediate surgical intervention, and vulnerable samples. Interventions: Patients were randomized to Group 1 (n = 70; IHMs plus concomitant care; verum) and Group 2 (n = 70; placebos plus concomitant care; control). Outcome measures: Primary-the anorectal symptom severity and quality-of-life (ARSSQoL) questionnaire, and secondary-the EuroQol 5-dimensions 5-levels (EQ-5D-5L) questionnaire and EQ visual analogue scale (VAS); all of them were measured at baseline, and every month, up to 3 months. Results: Out of the 140 randomized patients, 122 were protocol compliant. Intention-to-treat sample (n = 140) was analyzed. The level of significance was set at p < 0.05 two tailed. Statistically significant between-group differences were elicited in the ARSSQoL total (Mann-Whitney U [MWU]: 1227.0, p < 0.001) and EQ-5D-5L VAS (MWU: 1228.0, p = 0.001) favoring homeopathy against placebos. Sulfur was the most frequently prescribed medicine. No harm or serious adverse events were reported from either of the groups. Conclusions: IHMs demonstrated superior results over placebo in the short-term treatment of hemorrhoids of grades I-III. The findings are promising, but need to be substantiated by further phase 3 trials.
Are we to believe that the authors were able to pull off 2 large almost identical studies within just 2 years?
Pull the other one!
Might this be a fitting task for AI?
Let’s see; I gave ‘Gemini’ the following task: “Give me a list of the 10 biggest charlatans in the field of alternative medicine + a short explanation why they are generally considered to be charlatans”
Here is the response:
The term “charlatan” is highly subjective and often used by critics to describe individuals who promote medical treatments that lack scientific evidence or conflict with established biology. While many practitioners in alternative medicine are viewed by their followers as pioneers, they are often labeled charlatans by the scientific community due to claims of “miracle cures,” the rejection of conventional data, or the sale of unproven products.
The following list includes ten figures who are frequently cited in skeptical and medical literature as major examples of this phenomenon:
1. Kevin Trudeau
Trudeau is perhaps the most famous modern example of a medical “hawker.” He authored Natural Cures “They” Don’t Want You to Know About, a book that alleged a massive conspiracy between the FDA and pharmaceutical companies to hide cures for cancer and other diseases.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: He was repeatedly sued by the FTC for making false claims and was eventually sentenced to 10 years in prison for criminal contempt related to his deceptive infomercials.
2. “Dr. Sebi” (Alfredo Bowman)
Despite not being a medical doctor, Bowman gained a massive following by claiming he could cure AIDS, cancer, and diabetes through a strictly alkaline diet and herbal supplements.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: He claimed that all disease is caused by “mucus” and that his “African Bio-Mineral Balance” could eliminate it—a claim with no basis in human physiology. He was successfully sued by the New York Attorney General for practicing medicine without a license.
3. Andrew Wakefield
A former physician, Wakefield is the primary source of the modern anti-vaccine movement. In 1998, he published a fraudulent study in The Lancet suggesting a link between the MMR vaccine and autism.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: His study was found to be based on manipulated data and unethical treatment of children. He was subsequently stripped of his medical license, but he continues to profit from anti-vaccine activism.
4. Belle Gibson
An Australian wellness influencer, Gibson built a massive brand claiming she had cured her terminal brain cancer through diet, exercise, and alternative therapies.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: It was eventually revealed that she never had cancer. She also admitted to withholding thousands of dollars in promised donations to various charities.
5. Joseph Mercola
Mercola is an osteopathic physician who runs one of the most profitable “alternative health” websites in the world. He has frequently promoted homeopathic remedies and criticized standard medical practices like vitamin K shots for newborns.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: He has received multiple warning letters from the FDA for selling unapproved and misbranded products, such as “thermography” as a superior replacement for mammograms (which it is not).
6. Stanislaw Burzynski
A physician in Texas, Burzynski has spent decades selling “antineoplastons” as a cure for various cancers at his private clinic.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: Despite over 40 years of operation, he has never produced a peer-reviewed, Phase III clinical trial proving his treatments work. Critics argue he exploits desperate patients, charging them hundreds of thousands of dollars for unproven therapy.
7. Robert O. Young
The author of The pH Miracle, Young popularized the idea that “acidosis” is the cause of all disease and that an “alkaline diet” can cure everything from obesity to Stage IV cancer.
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Why labeled a charlatan: In 2016, he was convicted of practicing medicine without a license. It was revealed that one of his “patients,” a woman with breast cancer, paid him thousands for intravenous baking soda treatments before she ultimately died.
8. Hulda Clark
Clark was a naturopath who claimed that all diseases (including cancer and HIV) were caused by parasites and could be cured by a device she invented called the “Zapper,” which used low-voltage electricity.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: Her claims were entirely unscientific; she believed “electronic frequencies” could kill parasites instantly. She eventually died of multiple myeloma (a blood cancer), a disease her own device supposedly could have cured.
9. Matthias Rath
A German physician, Rath has aggressively promoted high-dose vitamin therapy as a cure for HIV/AIDS and heart disease.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: He ran advertisements in South Africa discouraging people from using antiretroviral drugs, claiming vitamins were a safer alternative. This campaign is estimated to have led to thousands of unnecessary deaths.
10. Gwyneth Paltrow (Goop)
While Paltrow is an actress, her lifestyle brand Goop has become a central hub for “luxury” alternative medicine, selling items like “Jade Eggs” for vaginal health and “Body Vibes” stickers.
-
Why labeled a charlatan: Goop has been forced to pay settlements for making unsubstantiated medical claims. Critics argue the brand uses “wellness” as a shield to sell pseudo-scientific products to wealthy, health-conscious consumers.
____________________
I have to say, this list disappoints me: hardly any of the above individuals would have appeared on my personal list of the 10 biggest charlatans!
Will I disclose my personal list?
No, I don’t think so.
How accurate are Dana Ullman’s articles? To answer this amusing question, I asked the AI platform ‘Gemini’ to find all the false statements in one of Dana’s articles (yes, I do admit that I am reluctant to read though an entire nonsensical paper – it would give me a headache or worse). This is the precise task I asked for:
Give me a bullet point list of all false statements in this text: Lessons from the Flu Epidemic of 1918: The Dangers of Using Fever Suppressing Drugs for Viral Infections.
[In case you want to read this lengthy paper yourself, here is the link]And here is the response I got from Gemini (bold emphasis by AI):
The text you provided is a well-known article by Dana Ullman that blends historical events with controversial medical theories. While some of the historical context (like the 1917 aspirin patent expiration) is accurate, the medical conclusions and the data regarding homeopathy are widely considered false or highly misleading by the scientific and medical communities.
Here is a bulleted list of the primary inaccuracies and misleading statements in the text:
1. Misrepresentation of the 1918 Pandemic Deaths
- The “Aspirin Theory”: The text suggests that a “large number” of the 50 million deaths in 1918 were due to aspirin overdose. This is based on a hypothesis by Dr. Karen Starko. While high doses of aspirin likely contributed to some deaths, the scientific consensus remains that the vast majority of deaths were caused by secondary bacterial pneumonia and the extreme virulence of the H1N1 virus itself, not aspirin poisoning.
- Aspirin and Bleeding Lungs: The text claims bleeding in the lungs is a “known side effect of aspirin overdose.” While salicylates can cause pulmonary edema, the “hemorrhagic” (bloody) lungs seen in 1918 victims are a hallmark of the severe viral pneumonia caused by that specific strain of influenza, not a specific marker for aspirin toxicity.
2. Inaccuracies Regarding COVID-19 and NSAIDs
- NSAIDs and Blood Clots: The text states that ibuprofen and naproxen are “known to lead to blood clots.” This is a significant mischaracterization. While chronic, long-term use of certain NSAIDs is linked to a slight increase in cardiovascular risk, they are not a primary cause of the acute “clotting storms” seen in COVID-19 patients. In fact, many COVID-19 protocols involve using blood-thinning agents (like aspirin) to prevent clots.
- The 80% Risk Claim: The claim that NSAID users have an 80% greater risk of venous thromboembolism is taken from observational studies that show correlation, not causation. People taking NSAIDs often have underlying inflammatory conditions that already increase their risk of clots.
3. False Claims About Homeopathy’s Success
- 1918 Mortality Rates: The text claims a 1.2% death rate in homeopathic hospitals vs. 29% in conventional hospitals. These figures are widely considered unreliable and anecdotal. They were self-reported by homeopathic practitioners at the time, lacked standardized diagnostic criteria, and did not account for “selection bias”.
- WHO Recognition: The WHO does not recognize homeopathy as the “second largest system of medicine” in terms of efficacy or official endorsement. It only recognizes it as a widely used traditional practice.
4. Scientific Misconceptions About Fever
- Fever Suppression Spreading Virus: The text claims that suppressing a fever “can enable the virus to spread throughout the body.” Clinical studies have generally shown that taking antipyretics does not significantly worsen disease outcomes or increase viral shedding.
- The “Cytokine Storm” Claim: The article suggests that when a fever-suppressing drug wears off, a person may experience a “cytokine storm.” This is medically incorrect.
5. Out-of-Context Quotes
- Paul Offit and Jane Brody: The text quotes them in a misleading way. They are vocal supporters of conventional medicine and vaccines, and the usage here is considered cherry-picking.
Summary Note: The FDA and the CDC have both clarified that there is no scientific evidence that taking ibuprofen or other NSAIDs worsens COVID-19.
_________________________
I know, this is just one of his many nonsensical papers. But it nevertheless suggests that Dana puts in quite a lot of effort into misleading the public.
Easter is the time to surprise our fellow humans, preferably with something nice. One does not need to be a clairvoyant to predict that many of us will use chocolate for this purpose. Overindulgence in chocolate is therefore not a rare event today.
How bad is that for your health?
Chocolate has both potential benefits and risks for our wellbeing. What makes the difference between good and bad are:
- the type (dark vs. milk/white),
- the quantity,
- individual health factors.
Its high (cocoa >70%) content antioxidants may improve heart health by lowering blood pressure, enhancing blood flow, and reducing LDL cholesterol oxidation. Some studies link moderate intake of dark chokolate (e.g., 20-45g weekly) to lower cardiovascular disease risk, better cognitive function, and mood boosts via endorphins and theobromine. It might also aid insulin sensitivity and reduce stroke risk in observational data. Some studies suggest small amounts (e.g., 30g daily of 70%+ cocoa) may reduce depressive symptoms by 50-70% compared to non-chocolate-eaters, via compounds like phenylethylamine, theobromine, and serotonin precursors that boost endorphins and calm inflammation. But, be warned: the evidence is promising but not definitive; large trials show inconsistent results, and overeating negates perks via weight gain.
Its high calorie, sugar and fat content promote weight gain, obesity, and tooth decay. Regular consumption can trigger migraines in sensitive people due to tyramine and phenylethylamine, and may weaken bone density over time. Multiple studies link chocolate consumption to increased acne lesions, especially in young adults. One study found men eating chocolate capsules developed more comedones, papules, and pustules within days, with dose-dependent effects. Mechanisms include sugar-induced insulin spikes boosting sebum, cocoa’s promotion of inflammation (e.g., IL-1β) and corneocyte desquamation, plus bacterial colonization on skin surfaces.
The conclusion, I guess, is that our habit of stuffing ourselves with chocolate over Easter is not altogether healthy, particularly if we consider that Easter eggs are often filled with the worst type. Yet it might still be healthier than what they do in Papua New Guinea.
In this country, “Easter tobacco trees” replace chocolate eggs, unsuited to the tropical climate, with trees or branches adorned by tobacco sticks and cigarette packets as communal offerings. The churches erect these “Easter tobacco trees” for Easter Sunday services. Congregants then decorate the trees with tobacco products before distributing them post-service as gifts or “treats,” akin to egg hunts elsewhere. Feasts of leftovers follow, blending Christian ritual with cultural adaptation.
Personally, I must say that I prefer chocolate overindulgence to proven carcinogens.
We all know, I think, what homeopaths say about homeopathy. We also know what everyone else says about it. And the two set of opinions could not be more different. In this context, it might be interesting to learn what writers have to say about the subject. Here is a list of quotes from the non-medical, non-scientific literature (I am sure there are many more; if you know some, please let me know):
Boyd, W. (Restless, 2006)
“She had a small leather case of homeopathy remedies, Nux Vomica, Pulsatilla, Arnica, that she treated like a traveling reliquary.”
Coetzee, J.M. (Elizabeth Costello, 2003)
“He is a believer in homeopathy, in the healing power of water, in the memory of water. He is a man of the eighteenth century, really.”
Cunningham, M. (The Hours, 1998)
“She has tried everything: homeopathy, psychotherapy, prayer. She is a woman who lives in the hope of a miraculous adjustment.”
Enright, A. (The Gathering, 2007)
“My mother had a great belief in homeopathy, which is just a way of saying she had a great belief in nothing at all, provided it came in a very small bottle.”
Franzen, J. (The Corrections, 2001)
“Enid was deep into a phase of homeopathy, convinced that a decillionth of a gram of honeybee sting would cure her husband’s tremors.”
Márquez G.G. (“Serenade: How My Father Won My Mother”, 2001)
“…devoted his talent as an autodidact to a science on the decline: homeopathy.”
Hustvedt, S. (The Blazing World, 2014)
“He was the kind of man who treated his neuroses with homeopathy and his physical ailments with intense, silent resentment.”
McEwan, I. (Solar, 2010)
“He had no time for homeopathy, which he considered a form of witchcraft for people who were too polite to carry crystal wands.”
O’Farrell, M. (Instructions for a Heatwave, 2013)
“She kept a kit of homeopathy in her bag, tiny glass vials of white pills that looked like the breath of ghosts.”
Self, W. (How the Dead Live, 2000)
“Lily’s faith in homeopathy was such that she believed if she diluted her own death enough, she might eventually become immortal.”
St. Aubyn, E. (At Last, 2011)
“He had reached that stage of desperation where even homeopathy seemed like a robust and evidence-based option.”
H.G. Wells (Tono-Bungay, 1909)
“By the time my uncle had taken to homeopathy, I realized that his faith in science was of a very elastic kind.”
George Bernard Shaw (Preface to The Doctor’s Dilemma, 1906)
“I have a faith in homeopathy that would make a Harley Street physician shudder, though I suspect it rests less on evidence than on temperament.”
Thomas Mann (The Magic Mountain, 1924)
“He spoke of homeopathy with a curious mixture of irony and conviction, as though the less there was of it, the more there must be.”
Aldous Huxley (Eyeless in Gaza, 1936)
“She placed her trust in homeopathy, preferring infinitesimal certainties to the gross invasions of modern medicine.”
Doris Lessing (The Golden Notebook, 1962)
“She was experimenting with diets and homeopathy, as if the body might be coaxed into sanity by gentler means.”
Margaret Atwood (Cat’s Eye, 1988)
“My mother believed in homeopathy, in small doses and invisible forces, which seemed to me another way of saying she believed in hope.”
Zadie Smith (White Teeth, 2000)
“He dabbled in homeopathy, convinced that the less substance there was, the more profound the cure.”
David Lodge (Therapy, 1995)
“I tried homeopathy for a while, but it seemed to require a belief in something so small it might not exist at all.”
Hilary Mantel (Giving Up the Ghost, 2003)
“Homeopathy offered the promise of healing without intrusion, a whisper of cure rather than a command.”
Martin Amis (The Information, 1995)
“He regarded homeopathy as a joke that had somehow outlived the punchline.”
______________________
It seems to me that, when it comes to homeopathy, the writers tend to agree with the scientists.
I recently came across an aricle entitled “Reiki for Stress Relief” which I thought was excptional even for the often surprising literature on Reiki. Here is the abstract:
Reiki is Holistic. It isn’t just about the mental, or just about the physical, but both, and an overall restoration and improvement to you. And as we know, often the mental and physical are linked.
While the scientific understanding of Reiki’s effects on emotional blocks is still evolving, many individuals report subjective benefits, such as emotional release, relaxation, and a greater sense of inner peace, following Reiki sessions.
As the philosophy of Reiki is grounded in holistic medicine and thought, it is imperative to continue that tradition and also integrate other scientific -backed therapies such as the ones your doctor may suggest if you have a serious medical or mental condition. A balanced approach is key, and Reiki is possibly a powerful tool and philosophy that can be the missing key or complement to your current care regimen.
This is impressive! Don’t you just love how it’s ‘grounded in holistic thought’ while the scientific understanding is ‘still evolving’ ? That’s a very elegant way of admitting ‘we’re still waiting for the first piece of evidence’. And we all appreciate the disclaimer to actually see a real doctor as soon as we are truly ill.
The Canadian comedian Mayce Galoni had perhaps the best measure of Reiki when he did his stand-up bit about his nephew “becoming a Reiki master” at the age of 21: “My 21-year-old nephew is now a Reiki master. I didn’t even know you could be a master of anything at 21… Reiki is the only career where you can get paid for doing exactly what I do when I can’t find the TV remote.”
