Yes, yes, yes – it’s true: I am the living proof for homeopathy’s incredible efficacy; Much more importantly: so is Samuel Hahnemann! In fact, his case is even more convincing.
This is our story, Sam’s and mine:
We both developed hair loss fairly relatively early in our lives. As dedicated homeopaths, we did not despair. We both knew the solution to our problem only too well: HOMEOPATHY. The treatment had to be holistic, individualised, potentised and energised to activate our vital force; this took a while but then the cure was quick, complete and impressive. We both re-grew a full head of healthy, thick hair.
Hold on, you will say, both Hahnemann and Ernst are almost completely bald!
Yes, of course, we had little choice but to regularly shave off the newly sprouting hair in order to give the image of alopecia.
Well alright then: BIG PHARMA made us offers that we simply could not refuse. They were apparently very afraid that the immense power of homeopathy would become visible on our scalps for the world to see (much more so in Sam’s case than in mine – he is after all the founder of the homeopathy trade!). So, they offered us fortunes and eventually we agreed to the deals. Sam got himself a young woman and moved from miserable Koethen to glamorous Paris to live the high life; and I retired from my under-paid university post in Exeter and live like ‘Bosch in France’ ever since. (Over time, our wives got used to saving our heads to create the appearance of male baldness, and nobody would have ever known)
Unfortunately, the truth is now seeping out.
Thousands of websites have sprung up in recent months giving away our secret: homeopathy is the ultimate cure for baldness. Here is one of them:
…Although hair loss is not a life threatening condition but it can be a source of constant stress and worry in the persons affected by it. A person suffering from hair loss possesses lower self esteem and self confidence levels, and also feels embarrassed when in company of other people. Homeopathy can very efficiently deal with cases of hair loss, and produce excellent results. In Homeopathy, a huge number of wonderful medicines are present that are used to tackle hair loss cases. Every kind of hair loss (ranging from hair loss due to anemia / nutritional deficiencies, due to skin disorders, due to mental / physical trauma, due to childbirth or menopause, after acute diseases, to alopecia areata, alopecia totalis or androgenetic alopecia) can be treated with the help of well selected homeopathic medicines. To treat hair loss through homeopathy detail case history of the patient needs to be studied. The cause and site of hair loss are to be noted down along with the constitutional symptoms of the patient which are given prime importance in any kind of case of hair loss. The constitutional symptoms include the eating habits, level of thirst, thermals, mental symptom etc. and these are to be given top position in forming the totality of symptoms while case taking. After the case has been properly evaluated, the case homeopathic medicine is administered to the patient…
So… now the truth is out. Of course, both Sam Hahnemann and I felt embarrassed about taking bribes from BIG PHARMA (the fact that many other alt med gurus also do it for money was no real conciliation), but this sentiment cured the embarrassment of early onset baldness.
Yet another proof that LIKE CURES LIKE!?!