Millions of Trump devotees need our help! … Here are some SCAMs that might work

It has been pointed out to me that my recent posts on the thorny subject of Donald Trump have angered many of his devoted fans. I am so sorry! Now that Trump is (almost) history, these poor, disappointed people need our help; they urgently need some effective anger management before they start firing those weapons they have been amassing.

This is why, in the spirit of building bridges and in the interest of peace, I have made an effort and put together a list of so-called alternative medicines (SCAMs) that might be useful.

Various pharmaceutical medications are available for treating anxiety, stress and anger problems:

Anxiolytics e.g. Alprazolam, Diazepam,
Antidepressants e.g. Paroxetine, Fluoxetine,
Antipsychotics e.g. Paliperidone, Risperidone,
Mood regulators e.g. Lithium, Valproate.

Oh, sorry! I have angered you again! I forgot, you are SCAM only. Let me have a look into my own book and find something that works for your problems.

ANXIETY

• Massage
• Music therapy
• Various relaxation techniques

DEPRESSION

• St John’s wort

Yes, these are the only SCAMs that are listed as being supported by sound evidence.

What, you say, you care a f**k about evidence? Of course, I should have known!

But my book offers nothing for delusional disorders, sorry.

Not good enough, you say? Alright, alright, keep your gun where it is. I better look elsewhere.

Found something. Thanks heavens for homeopathy! One can always rely on homeopaths to offer help, and they certainly know a thing or two about delusions! One website has this long list of remedies for delusional disorders:

Stramonium

Vision of animals, black dogs etc. (It also cured pneumonia on these symptoms). Thinks himself double, tall and a part missing and objects around him small. Cannot bear solitude and darkness; must have light and company. Sees ghosts, hears voices and talks with spirits. Feeling as if a long trail of bedbugs is pursuing her, and after them a procession of beetles and then comes crawling over her a host of cockroaches. Sees horrifying images at his side than in front of him. Sings amorous songs and utters obscene speeches. Hallucination and delirium. Attempts to stab and bite. Calls things by wrong names, his boots the logs of wood; his bedroom the stable. Has communication from God, delivers sermons, prophecies.

Lactuca Virosa

As if swimming in the air or walking above the ground.

Chloralum

Night terrors. Sees visions of arches. Hears voices when in the dark or when eyes are shut.

Lac Can

Delusions about snakes. Imagines he is surrounded by them. Afraid of closing the eyes for fear of being bitten by a snake. Feels to be walking in air. Tormenting thoughts. No reality in things; thinks that everything she says is a lie; she is not herself; her properties not her own; wears someone else’s nose.

Sabadilla

Erroneous impressions as to the state of her body e.g. that she is pregnant when she is merely swollen with flatus.

Platinum

Pride or over-estimate of one-self. Thinks she is superior to all others. Thinks her body is longer than those of others. Arrogant and haughty.

Camphor

Everything that moves is a ghost and inanimate things in the room become alive and terrify him. Extreme nervousness. Fear of strangers and of the dark.

Calcarea Carb

Sees and talks to persons who are not present. Imagines as if she is surrounded by dogs. Aversion to do any business. She is sad and melan­choly. Full of fear, weary of life.

Ailanthus

Feels as if a rat or something small is crawling up the limb and over the body.

Anacardium

The patient finds himself to be between good and evil will. His external will wants him to do some­thing evil, but his internal will stops him from doing this.

Indecisive

One moment he thinks it is so and the next moment has enough reason left that it is not so. Low spirited, disheartened, fears he is pursued by someone; looks for thieves, expects enemies, fears everything and everybody. He is pursuaded by his evil will to do acts of violence and injustice, but is withheld and restrained by his good will. (See also Hyosc, Bell., and Stram.) Hears voices of sister and mother who are far away.

Helleborus Nig

Stupefaction and sluggishness of the body and mind. Stupor from which he can be aroused with” difficulty and when so aroused he will talk about spirits or say that he sees devils with horns and tails. Hallucination.

Causticum

Conscience stricken as if she had committed a crime.

Ferrum Iod:

As if body had grown 30 feet high.

Baptisia T:

Feels as if body scattered into pieces.

Chamomilla

Hearing voices of absent persons which disturb his sleep.

Zincum Met

Voices from within him speaking in abusive and filthy language.

Belladonna

Sees frightful faces and monsters. Bites and strikes. Patient will not injure himself or others unless he thinks he is acting in self-defence. He will attack the person who is “acting against the patient’s will.

Spigelia

For apprehensive and nervous persons. Will not use razor, as something is constantly urging him to cut throat with it. Urge to commit suicide with fork when at dining table and so on. Afraid of sharp and pointed instruments.

Thuja

Sensation as though a living child were in the abdomen. Feels body thin and delicate, frail, easily breakable as if made of glass.

Cannabis Ind

Errors of perception as to space and as to time. The patient feels as if he had not taken any food for the last six months, although he had just finished his meals. A mile distance looks as if it were a hundred miles. Mind is full of unfinished ideas. Delusion of rhinoceros and elephants following him up. Imagines he hears sweet music, shuts his eyes and is lost in most delicious thoughts and dreams. Imagines someone calling him. Imagines as if he exists without form throughout a vast extent of space. His body seems to expand and the arch of his skull to be broader than the vault of heaven. All seem unreal. Feels himself unreal. All impressions extremely exaggerated. Hears voices and most sublime music; sees vision of beauty and glory, only to be equalled in paradise.

Arsenic Alb

Imagines house full of thieves. Runs through the house in search of them or hides himself in the house on account of fear.

Cicuta Virosa

Feels as if he were in a strange place and not living in ordinary conditions; everything appeared strange and almost frightful. Contempt of mankind. Runs away from his friends on account of disgust with their follies.

Viscum Alb

Delusion as if upper part of the body is floating in the air.

Coculus

Delusion as if something is rolling on walls, chairs, floor or elsewhere and will also roll on him.

Hyoscyamus

Talks to imaginary people as if they are sitting by his side. Talking to dead wife, sister or husband as if they were here again on earth. Imagines the things are worms, vermin, rats, cats, and mice. Feels as if his hands and fingers are too large.

Cocaine

Thinks he hears unpleasant remarks about himself; hallucination of hearing. Cannot sleep for hours after retiring. Sees and feels bugs and worms in his room and bed. Moral sense blunted.

Alumina

When he says anything, he feels as if another person has said it. Similarly if he sees anything, he feels as if another person had seen it, or as if he could transfer himself into another person and then only he could see. Confusion of personal identity.

Glonoine

Chin feels elongated to knees. Touching the chin repeatedly to be sure that it was not so.

Carboneum Sul

Hears voices and believes he has committed robbery.

Lachesis

When she sees anyone in whispering conversation, she thinks they are talking about her to her detriment. She thinks herself under superhuman control whose commands (partly in dream) she must obey. Fears that she is pursued by enemies; the medicine is a poison; that there are robbers in the house and she wants to jump out of window.

Melilotus

Delusion; thinks everyone is looking at her; fears to talk aloud; wants to run away.

Agnus C

Delusion of smell as of herring (kind of fish) or musk.

Coca

Delusion; of worms on the skin or clothing.

Aethusa

Delusion; sees cats and dogs; wants to jump out of bed or window.

Asarum Europ

As if hovering in the air. Vertigo as if drunk.

Baryta Carb

As if everything rocks with him, as in a ship.

Crocus

As if something alive is in abdomen. Imaginary pregnancy. Alternating mood.

Morphinum

As if room filled with babies. Man at foot of bed. Cannot describe symptoms.  Sobs at trifles.

Medorrhinum

Feels as if things done today were done a week ago; as if someone is whispering behind her, faces appearing from behind the furniture and look at her and say, “come”. Feels life unreal like a dream. Had committed unpardonable sin, and was going to hell. Not caring whether she goes to hell or heaven. Impatient, very selfish.

Mercurius

Feels as if worm rising in throat; apple-core stuck in throat; ice hi ear; cold water running from ears.

Palladium

Feels that she has been neglected. Wounded pride.

Petroleum

Imagines that another person or a child is in bed with her. Dreams that she is two or more. That her limbs are double.

Psorinum

Feels as if brain separated from the body; as if there is not enough room in forehead; as if he heard with ears not his own.

Cyclamen

Thinks herself impure and wants to take bath every time she touches somebody or something. Every thing seems double. As if person lying in bed. Ailments from duty not done or bad act committed.

Staphisagria

When he walks he feels as if someone were following him. This causes anxiety and fear and he cannot look behind.

Sulphur

Everything turns into beauty. Old rag and old stick looks to be a beautiful piece of workmanship. Every thing looks pretty which the patient takes fancy to. Wishing to touch everything.

Cannabis Sat

Hears hissing whisper to kill himself. This is an order from the Most High Command.

Cuprum Aceticum

Delusion that a policeman has come to seize him. Hallucinations of all kinds of figures and premises, especially in the evening, when shutting eyes or when going to sleep.

Oleander

Washes herself and her clothes after touching anything or any person, as she believes she has touched a dirty thing as a result of which she must wash.

Pyrogenium

Hallucination that he is very wealthy and has a large sum of money in the bank.

Nux Moschata

Seems as if he is two persons and watches his other self playing. He seems lost, and when spoken to would come to himself confused. Feels as if she has two heads.

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Did you find something that fits?

No?

Then let me help you: Pride or over-estimate of one-self. Thinks she is superior to all others. Arrogant and haughty. Yes, that must be for you; PLATINUM it is!!!

Hope you get better soon.

And, if I may, I suggest PYROGENIUM for your idol.

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PS

A personal note: during the last 4 years, I have turned down all invitations for lectures in the US and argued that I do not travel to counties with fascistoid leaders. Once the pandemic is under control, I’d be happy to reconsider.