MD, PhD, FMedSci, FSB, FRCP, FRCPEd

First she promoted vaginal steam baths and now Gwyneth Paltrow claims that putting a ball of jade (which you can order from her online-business, if you happen to have the cash) in their vaginas is good for women.

Yes, I kid you not; this is what she states on her website:

The strictly guarded secret of Chinese royalty in antiquity—queens and concubines used them to stay in shape for emperors—jade eggs harness the power of energy work, crystal healing, and a Kegel-like physical practice. Fans say regular use increases chi, orgasms, vaginal muscle tone, hormonal balance, and feminine energy in general. Shiva Rose has been practicing with them for about seven years, and raves about the results; we tried them, too, and were so convinced we put them into the goop shop. Jade eggs’ power to cleanse and clear make them ideal for detox…

But if you think that Gwyneth is somehow fixated on her feminine parts, you are probably mistaken. She is much more versatile than that and seems to employ her vagina merely for drumming up publicity for her business. If you browse her site, you find no end of baffling, vagina-unrelated wonders and purchasable products from the world of alternative medicine.

Here are just two further examples.

Flower  remedies

A flower essence is a bioenergetic preparation. Through the use of sunlight and water, we are able to capture the energy of a flower and use it for healing purposes: A freshly harvested flower is placed on the surface of water for a specific length of time and exposed to sunlight, resulting in the vibrational imprint of the flower in water. The flower essence is then used as an energetic remedy, with each flower having its own range of unique therapeutic benefits.

Vibrational imprint?

Unique therapeutic benefit?

Pull the other one! The truth about (Bach) flower remedies is much simpler: they are expensive placebos.

A method for getting rid of the parasites we allegedly all suffer from

…an eight-day, mono-diet goat-milk cleanse—accompanied by a specific vermifuge made of anti-parasitic herbs—is the most successful treatment. Parasites primarily live in the mucus lining of the gut system, where they feed on nutrients before they enter the body. Think of the goat milk as bait—parasites come out of the gut lining to drink the milk, which they love, but they also consume the vermifuge, which will eventually eradicate them. On top of being highly effective, this method is a much more gentle medicine than bombarding them—and your body—with a harsh drug.

Are they for real?

This is pure and potentially very dangerous, unethical nonsense!

Oh sorry – I forgot: we now must call it differently now: we are obviously dealing with Gwyeneth’s ‘alternative facts’.

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